I feel like a spoiled little thing even approaching the subject, but I guess my fingers won't stop typing and I am just getting it out. There are so many great things in my life, more blessings than I can even count (although it might do me some good to try). However, I just feel empty!
It started yesterday when Bert called to tell me that due to the new contract their company secured (which is a really great thing as they have had to lay off 50% of their workforce over the past year due to LACK of contracted jobs ... to see business picking up again is, well, HUGE) he will need to work as many of his days off as possible to get everything ready for this new job.
That starts to seem overwhelming to me when I consider that the last day off where he was home with the family was October 10 (they have to work 10 days on and then take 4 days off due to all the layoffs and the need to keep the support office open and available everyday), and then next one will be November 5!
That's 26 days of living with the man I love and hardly seeing him!
I'm feeling ... I don't even know what I'm feeling ... I'm hardly feeling anything ... I am just there!
I'm feeling frustrated with myself for letting this affect me. I'm feeling pathetic, as I look at the lives of many women who go without their husbands for much longer periods of time (military, medical, drillers, truck drivers, sales reps with large areas). I still get to kiss my husband good night and good morning, I still get to feel safe at night knowing he is there, I still get to chat with him a little bit on the phone during the day.
So what is my problem?
What do I need to do to not feel so alone?
I know all the answers, but I just can't seem to kick into gear and do it.
I just really like my husband and I like to see him and spend time with him and these 26 days without him seem like an eternity.
I guess I just want to pout!
So, all you wives that hardly see your husbands ... how do you do it? How do you not turn into a whiny little wench? And then, how do you do it all with kids, too?
Okay ... I think I'm done ... I will be counting my blessings tomorrow!
(oh how I really hope nobody reads this)